15 Comments

This information couldn't be more timely or useful. You're helping me shift from a sense of overwhelm and limitation to feeling like there are viable options as I try to help my mother prepare for the coming years and start making more plans and decisions for my husband and I. Thank you!

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I like the list of considerations for living in a housemate situation.

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Jun 24Liked by Sue Kusch

Sue, I really appreciate your articles on aging and things to consider. We feel like we are just at a place where we can focus on maintaining our property, rather than building and improving the space, and look forward to some time enjoying all of it! However, I see us both slowing down a bit and choosing to hire some of the work rather than doing everything ourselves. Your questions about what to consider help me with some options to consider for the future. Thank you for your thoughtful content and research! 🙏💕

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Thank you for your comment, Sandi. I am also feeling the slow down and looking to hire out for some of the maintenance.

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Thanks for the thoughtful look at housing opportunities for seniors. It helped me understand why I live alone! In fact, I chuckled as I read your very useful list of things to think about with roommates--it took me back to graduate school and the communal living situations I lived in then but honestly would never tolerate now. I'm definitely in the stay-home-until-I-die cohort, and I hope I can pull it off. My house is pretty well set up for aging in place, and I will address the things that could become issues before they do. The only question is whether my mind and body will allow me to stay at home. I'm still working (at 67), still walking 5 or 6 miles a day and doing physical work, still have a strong circle of friends nearby. So I'm doing what I can to be prepared.

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Yes, I don't think I would live happily in a Golden Girls house share. Though co-housing appeals to me, I think my introversion would feel a constant irritation. Like most older adults, I am definitely leaning into the "stay-home-until-I-die" preference. Tending to our wellness becomes a priority! Thanks for your comment, Susan.

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Jun 24Liked by Sue Kusch

Much to consider here. These are things we must all think about and plan for a future time in our lives. I think much of our choice(s) will be dictated by our health as time goes on. From where I am now, looking forward and assuming my health will stay good, the cohousing option is appealing. Thank you.

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Thanks for your comment, Jenny. I agree 100% that our health will likely determine our living options as we age.

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Health has a huge impact on how/where we will live. My Mom will be 80 in September. She still lives, alone (with her two dogs), on the isolated ranch where we grew up. I am in awe of her; she is active and strong, far beyond most people of her age. I have my fingers crossed that I will be the same when I reach those years. But, we never know when our health may suddenly change and make our current living situation extremely difficult or impossible, so it is vital to have a plan in place.

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We just moved from a rural setting on 3 acres to a 55+ community nearer our kids and grandkids. We didn’t exactly downsize our home but can live on one level if the need arises. But I’ve left my big gardens, brambles and bittersweet we already had to hire people to pull up, a large yard that required mowing, and a really long driveway my husband snowplowed.

It’s not cheap and there are rules. But there are nice amenities and we felt we were young and active enough to plug in and meet new friends. In hindsight, after the big move/purge, I’m very glad we did this now while we are in our 60s. It was already an overwhelming task.

I kind of like the idea of multi-generational communities, but it’s also kind of nice being with people in the same stage of life. We all have a lot in common. And there are plenty of kids and grandkids that come visiting.

Excited for you checking out the permaculture community. I visited one in Western MA when I was in the midst of my permaculture studies. A younger me would have loved to live that way. But the older me only had the stamina and circumstances to bring permaculture principles into gardening and community-building.

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Thank you for sharing your experience. Rural living does involve a lot of work and aging makes all of it slower! I have been working toward downsizing and preparing for change; I believe there is some freedom on the other side. I have been living by permaculture principles for over a decade and completed my design certificate in 2020. Unfortunately, the agrivillage development I was researching was well beyond my means. Estimated cost of home ranged from$800k to over 1 million dollars!

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Jun 23Liked by Sue Kusch

One twist on the RV lifestyle is serving as camp host at BLM or other government-owned campgrounds. The folks hosting at the campground next to our Alaska cabin spent winters hosting in a warmer clime. It's not for everyone, for sure, but can be great for certain folks, especially couples, during their active years. Very thoughtful article, Sue -- thanks!

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Thanks for this reminder. My folks served as camp hosts at a AZ campground on a lake in the White Mountains for several years and I think that experience was their happiest while living in their RV. I know another couple who did the same in WA for several years and he actually wrote a book about his experiences and encounters.

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Sue, you are doing such important work with these posts on aging in America! I am loving all that you are covering. Here are some things that I think about with finding the right place for me.

Open my mind to the fact that it will never get easier to tackle this issue. Start reading and talking to people with knowledge on what is available. Talk to seniors in various living situations for the pros and cons of their arrangements. Visit senior centers and talk to people! 🙂

Get real about my own changing body and mind. How does this play into where I might best live. What is a realistic living arrangement that lets me still be active while also cutting back on daily and yearly chores.

When deciding on any living arrangement change, I need to talk to family, friends and a lawyer as well as those whom I might be living with in the new arraignment.

As the adult child who cared for her parents for about 10 years, how we seniors make these decisions is not only important for ourselves, but also for our children. Whatever we decide .... changes their lived, too.

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Thank you Sandy. Part of my motivation for writing about aging is because of its impact on family and our society. As I learn more I now believe that planning this stage of our lives is key to our happiness and health.

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