Wanted: Housing & Community for Aging Americans
Part Two: Sharing, Cohousing, Senior Communities & the Open Road
In Wanted: Housing & Community for Aging Americans - Part One, I discussed some housing options for older Americans: aging in place (the #1 preference in polls) and sharing housing with family. In Part Two, I look at four other options: shared housing with friends/strangers, cohousing, age-restricted senior communities, and the open road lifestyle.
The Golden Girls Arrangement
Sharing a house with others can be an affordable arrangement for seniors who don’t want to live with their adult children or for the 16% of Americans who don’t have children. Our imaginations can paint a lovely picture: housemates who enjoy each other’s company, share meals and cleaning chores, and offer emotional support to each other. However, most of us have had at least one negative experience with roommates in our younger days, and it provides a more realistic way to think about sharing housing.
Shared housing for older people generally takes two forms: a group of older people, often already friends, purchase a house together, or the more common approach where one homeowner rents out rooms, now referred to as the “Golden Girls Arrangement” based on the 1980s sitcom. Whether buying a house or renting a room, shared housing requires a lot of thought, effort, and communication if a sustainable and pleasant living environment is desired. In the right situation, shared housing can include mental health benefits by reducing isolation, anxiety, and depression. I have created a list of topics, suggestions, and questions to consider if you are considering these options.
Remember, it’s the little things that can blow up a situation.
If buying a home with others, a lawyer is likely necessary to create co-owning contracts. Rooms should be rented according to state laws, and tenants’ rights and lease agreements are highly recommended so that all parties are on the same page.
Important topics to discuss:
Vision and Expectations of Shared Housing: Is it strictly a financial arrangement with no expectations of shared time together, like meals? Or are you seeking a more family-like setting where meals and activities are shared?
Managing Expenses and Household Chores: What are the common house areas' expectations for clutter management and cleanliness? Who will clean what, or will professionals be hired? What are the pet peeves of each housemate? Be sure to address yardwork and maintenance tasks.
Are pets allowed? If yes, be specific about the kind of pets and tolerated behaviors (allowed on the couch or kitchen counters?). What about damages caused by pets?
Noise: Over 50% of Americans watch ten or more hours of television weekly. My mom turned on her TV first thing in the morning and often fell asleep at night with it on. When I visited, it was jarring to my nervous system. And as her hearing worsened, the volume went up!
Visitors: Are overnight visitors allowed? Imagine waking up to a housemate’s date who spent the night pouring coffee in your kitchen. What about grandchildren's visits and overnight stays?
Age and Gender of housemates: Multi-generational or the same age? Both men and women or just one gender?
Social and Interpersonal Qualities: Introverts or extroverts? Do personal politics or religious practices matter? What about holiday celebrations?
Aging Issues: If shared housing is for seniors, how will caregiving needs be addressed? This is critical to consider; if a housemate has a stroke and needs help with mobility, transportation, special diet, managing medication, and/or getting dressed, will housemates help? Can the house accommodate wheelchairs? Will home hospice be allowed? What plans do senior residents have for their living arrangements once they can no longer care for themselves?
Cohousing
Communal housing is not a modern concept; humans evolved living in small villages, relying on each other to be cooperative participants. Cohousing is the 21st-century version and is seeing a renewed interest throughout North America.
The Cohousing Association of the US defines cohousing as:
“Cohousing is a community intentionally designed with ample common spaces surrounded by private homes. Collaborative spaces typically include a common house with a large kitchen and dining room, laundry, and recreational areas and outdoor walkways, open space, gardens, and parking. Neighbors use these spaces to play together, cook for one another, share tools, and work collaboratively. Common property is managed and maintained by community members, providing even more opportunities for growing relationships.”
These communities vary widely in North America: urban condos in one building, small homes clustered around a community building, and rural communities that often incorporate farming on the shared land. Many are multi-generational but senior communities also exist. The key distinctions about cohousing are that it is rooted in relationships and an active lifestyle. As self-managed communities, residents share decision-making and budget management, plan and participate in social activities, and offer support to their co-residents. Visits are encouraged before buying into these communities. I have invested time researching several communities but their costs reflect the area’s real estate market values (a 720 sq. ft. condo in a nearby cohousing group is listed for $490k plus a $500 monthly HOA fee) and it seems that residences seldom come up for sale.
The Cohousing Association website offers additional information on the benefits and expectations of an intentional community as well as an incomplete list of communities in the US.
Age-Restricted Senior Communities
These exist throughout the US and with a wide range of choices. Many are mobile or manufactured home parks and others are exclusive gated communities. Residents must be 55 or older and purchase the home but rent the lot space and/or pay a monthly fee. The communities are often owned by corporations (the late Jimmy Buffet created four Latitude Margaritaville communities) which hire staff to manage and maintain the communities’ common spaces. Most communities offer amenities like clubhouses, pools, fitness rooms, shuffleboard, tennis courts, and golf courses. Social activities are offered and residents can choose to be engaged or not.
My research revealed that many of these communities maintain a plethora of rules that residents must agree to and are mostly restrictions on pets, paint colors, landscaping, visitors, and common facilities use. In many cases, potential residents have to be approved by the corporate manager or a council of current residents. In the past, some of the older mobile home parks were an affordable option for seniors but in the last decade, corporate investors/equity firms have been purchasing the parks, raising lot rents, and creating new rules.
Subsidized Senior Housing - Vouchers & Public Housing
In the US, the federal government offers vouchers to help pay the cost of rental housing for over 10 million seniors. Often referred to as Section 8, applicants have to meet citizenship and income requirements and are limited to rentals that qualify for Section 8 housing. Public senior housing is also available through federal funding. The demand outweighs the supply dramatically and there are multiple year wait lists in large urban areas. You can learn more here.
The Open Road
It’s estimated that over 1 million US residents live full-time in an RV, van, or car. A significant portion of these travelers are retired. Some invest in mammoth motorhomes that cost over 500k while others, forced by financial circumstances, live in older travel trailers or their vehicles (the book/movie Nomadland depicts one woman’s experience).
Depending on their incomes, RVers can travel throughout North America, staying at campgrounds, public lands, and private RV resorts. Some retired RVers continue to work and the ability to work remotely has changed the opportunities dramatically. It’s a different lifestyle that seems to appeal to everyone who is interviewed; I have yet to find an article where someone complained about living on the road! My mom and stepfather lived and traveled in a small motorhome for five years and enjoyed the experience but as their health declined they realized they needed to be settled in one place.
In Part Three of this housing series, I will discuss housing and care options for the space between independent living and death. For many elders, it is the most challenging time of their lives.
What have I missed? Is there another housing arrangement available to seniors that I didn’t mention? What appeals to you? Please share your thoughts and ideas in the comments.
This information couldn't be more timely or useful. You're helping me shift from a sense of overwhelm and limitation to feeling like there are viable options as I try to help my mother prepare for the coming years and start making more plans and decisions for my husband and I. Thank you!
I like the list of considerations for living in a housemate situation.